Recently I was asked: Why isn’t Boo potty-trained yet? She is 3 & 1/2
I wanted to reply: Because I like supporting Pampers. They seem like a nice company. (this was during the weekend that I became an idiot).
But the truth is, I just don’t think she is ready. She cannot tell me if she is hungry, tired, bored or why she is throwing the baby doll out of the baby carriage. She cannot help with getting her pants on or off and she could in no way get herself onto the toliet.
Then I second guess myself and think that in some ways I think she might be ready.
The other night she took my hand, said potty and walked into the bathroom. I put her on the toilet and she sat for a minute. She told me she was all done and got off. Nothing moved, so to speak. But I was so proud of her for sitting there for a minute.
Over the weekend we got together with some friends and one of the moms said to me, “Oh Boo isn’t trained either? Now I don’t feel so bad about K”. Okay, first I was thinking wow you are holding up your ‘normal’ almost 3 year old to Boo’s 4 year old standards–yeah Boo! But at that exact moment her daughter came up to the mom with diaper bag in hand and proclaimed “I NEED CHANGING!”. So, my second thought was, wow your daughter can tell you she needs changing but you don’t think she is ready for the potty?
My third thought, you jerk-Kerri-here you are judging another mother when you are so irked that others judge you/Boo. (Yes, I frequently yell at myself and call myself names).
It also made me question, again, how to train Boo. With Allie I had a deadline. Her daycare only went to an age and she HAD TO BE TRAINED by 2.9 years for the new preschool. I started early, totally improvised and remember to this day me thinking to myself that there is no way to teach some one how to use the toliet. I mean think about it. How do you describe what they are supposed to feel in order to get them to the toliet in time. With Allie I literally put the big girl panties on and she peed the floor. I remember saying to her, see what happened? If you think it is going to happen again run to the bathroom! And if you do that, I will give you 3 M&M’s (yes, 3!).
It was a long process, to say the least. And we went through a lot of M&M’s.
But how to train Boo? I am completely unprepared. I have no idea where to start. She has such trouble communicating, she cannot self-dress, she cannot manuever easily into a chair (even if I got a portable one). And do not even get me started on her constipation/diarrhea issues.
I do not want to set her up for failure. I also do not want to be lazy. As much as I enjoy supporting Pampers and Baby wipes, they do make life easier. Her GI doctor told me that due to her low muscle tone, potty training really wasn’t recommended yet. Developmental medicine told me that realistically she wasn’t capable of knowing when to go.
That has been my excuse, really. That I do not think Boo is ready.
But then she took my hand and went into the bathroom.
Boo has proven doctors wrong before. Maybe she is ready, I at least have to let her try.
Just not tonight because I have to make cookies….