When Bridget first entered the integrated preschool, I never thought of friendships. I was worried that she could not keep up. After all, barely off her pediatric walker she had to be taken in her stroller from the classroom to recess. I was more worried about her getting knocked to the ground than I worried about her making friends.
Then she did. It happened naturally without any parental involvement or teacher encouragement.
Oh my gosh they were so little
Last week we went to an Open House at Bridget’s school. It was the first Open House that I’ve been to since the disastrous kindergarten play date. I didn’t want to go, but since first grade was so incredible I wanted to make sure Bridget’s second grade is as successful. We entered the school lobby, tried to explain to Bridget why she did not have her backpack and took a deep breath anticipating the sure-to-be-awful-night.
Except the House was Open and Inviting. Continue reading
I have to start this post with a bit of honesty. Those that know me understand that I am a suck it up buttercup type of person. While I do believe that you get what you give, that if you embrace this world and are kind the world will be kind in return. I do not believe in the other-world, spirits or destiny. I believe we make our own destiny by the actions we undertake. For example I believe that if I stay up all night playing Cribbage with my best brother-in-law I will have a headache the next morning. If I run an obstacle race with Lauren I will be bruised but my stomach will hurt from laughing.
I have, no word of a lie, been asked to leave a spirit shop when I brought Tia (who does believe) to a mystic (?). I was told by the woman that I was cold and not only blocking the spirits but killing their desire to interact. Apparently I was also spiritually blocking someone’s uterus. Anyway, I left (without police escort!) and have led a very happy life even if the spirits believe in me as much as I believe in them.
Then I met Beth from NJ. Continue reading
Today is October 6th. For most it is just a day. For a few friends of mine today is a day to celebrate their children, their siblings, their parents and themselves.
Today is the day to Celebrate Cerebral Palsy Day.
Which is weird, in a strange way…that you would celebrate a disability. If you don’t get that moment, that gut check of why a disability should be celebrated I (sincerely) congratulate you on your healthy child and I wish that you would celebrate how incredibly lucky your are to have them.
Those of us who have a child/sibling/spouse/relative/friend with a disability understand why these days of celebration are so important. It’s not that we celebrate the difficult life we are leading. It’s that we celebrate the triumph over the roadblocks this some-days difficult life give us. Continue reading
Bridget has always attained her milestones at a different pace than her peers. There are some milestones I never thought would happen. Some of them I was misinformed by others that she would not be able to do. As Bridget continues to defy anyone dares to put limits on her, and this week she broke through one more “she would never”. Continue reading
Your child was just diagnosed. The doctor has left the exam room. They shook your hand, told you to follow-up in six-months or a year but be sure to call them if needed.
Then they walk out.
You walk out as well, because that is what is expected. You are either pushing a baby carriage, holding tight to your toddler’s hand or trying to get your teen to look at you.
Your heart is in your throat. You want to throw up, but know people frown on that in public. You are doing your best to make it to the parking garage, to drive home, to get into the shower before you lose whatever strength is holding you together.
You cry, ugly and silently. You ask, what the freak do I do now? Continue reading
I have once again, in complete error, created a new behavior in Bridget. Bridget likes things a certain way. It’s easier to go along, than to fight all the battles. Take for example Fig Newtons. What could go wrong with a Fig Newton, you ask? They are after all one of the healthiest snack food Bridget could want to eat. They are compact, not really messy and healthy. What more could a mom ask? Then this happened:
When your child is diagnosed with cancer, mental illness, a Syndrome, ADHD, Autism, (put your child’s struggle here) or PACS1 a parents first thought is usually a variation of HOLY CRAP to what the heck do I do now?
The truth is, there is no road map to parenting a child who has more than typical needs.
- Whether it is learning that your child is not suffering from normal teenage angst but a serious mental illness.
- Whether it is learning that your child just isn’t making milestones but is seriously behind their peers
- Whether it is learning the worst news a parent can receive, that their child may have a terminal diagnosis
- Whether it is learning that your child has ADHD, something too many people think is a made up word for bad parenting
- Whether it is learning that although you always fed your child healthy meals, that child is now bulimic or anorexic
- Whether it is learning that your child committed a crime, even though they are a straight-A student
- Whether it is learning that your child was killed in a drunk driving accident, even though they were sober in the car
When a parent learns any of the above (or worse), that is sometimes all they learn. They may be given a pamphlet of with website information. Their child may be placed on medication. Yet from this moment on, that parent is facing the battle to have their child survive without any clue of how to start. Continue reading
Before you become a parent you do a lot of reading and researching. You read What to Expect and (the more honest) Girlfriend’s Guide. You sign up for every blog, baby website and scour the Internet for a small glimpse to your highly anticipated new life.
You give birth to a healthy baby and rejoice. You ask Jenn before making any rash decisions. Then you quote her when you say, Well Jenn said it was okay to not the wash baby clothes before you put them in the dresser. You choose to breast feed or bottle, whatever is the healthiest choice for your family. Continue reading
This is the face of a preexisting condition:
It’s a pretty face. I think it is the most gorgeous face in the world. I remember looking at this face and thinking how beautiful, simply beautiful my child was. What you do not see at first glance is this picture was taken at Children’s Hospital. This was Bridget’s third month of life and third hospital admission, after five ER visits.
This picture represents the face of a preexisting condition. Continue reading