Monthly Archives: July 2013

I miss my kid

We have a great friend Tante (as Allie calls her). She is my old landlady, the one you always hope to have when you are young and in your twenties. She made me homemade cookies and minestrone soup. She taught me how to use a wood stove and how to be a young woman without the benefit of leaning on a man to do things for me. She laid the foundation, that took me years to build on, that liking myself was more important than hoping some one else would.

That and a few more reasons is why we adopted her into our clan. Tante is retired, has no children and her family is back in Canada. Over the past few summers she has taken Allie for the day. They have had great adventures, once renting a Jeep on the Vineyard for the day. (Allie’s only complaint was Tante’s friends forgot to talk to her in English).

This year, Allie had her first overnight. And then another and another. Last weekend we had a wedding just down the street from Tante’s home. She offered to babysit the girls for us and we jumped at the chance to go to an adult wedding and be adults.

When we went to pick the girls up that night Allie informed us she was staying. Apparently she had snuck her toothbrush, comb, clothes and all important Mimi (favored stuffed animal) into her backpack of “stuff” she just had to bring with her. We made plans to pick her up two days later.

Only to be told she would be home in September. And here is why:

They have been to the beach. The movies. Mini-golf. The beach. Pottery, yoga and pilates classes. The beach. They have ridden in bumper boats, explored museums and talked as long as Allie’s eyes have remained open. They have done their nails and read books together. Ice cream and dinners out. The beach. They have had sleep overs in every bed in the house.

Including the one in my old apartment.

When she calls at night she is so full of joy and so excited to fill me in.

Tante is giving Allie all the time and adventures we cannot. Not just because of Boo. Partly, if I am honest. There are a lot of activities we pass by knowing Boo will have a panic attack, especially the beach. But even if we take Boo out of the equation I do not know if I would take a week off of work to have a stay-cation. My vacation time is already planned for family time and Boo’s appointments.

When I was a little older than Allie, I had a favored Aunt that did for me what Tante is doing for Allie. I think every child should have that person in their life.

We are incredible thankful to Tante for loving Allie the way she does. For taking a week out of her summer to spoil a little girl who is just as happy sitting at the beach as she is playing mini-golf.

But I miss my girl. A week and a half is long enough. So she is coming home tomorrow.

I am sure by 7pm my ears will be bleeding as she tells me about her week.

And I will listen with a smile on my face, knowing I can send her back anytime!


It is Monday, and time to hear the Word of Allie.

Allie has been lucky to have wonderful teachers most of her life. She was a little nervous about her upcoming 4th grade teacher. She didn’t not get her first choice. But was very thankful that she received her second choice.

I asked her why she didn’t want Teacher X. I mean, really, how much could she know about the upcoming teachers?

Allie: Well, you see she doesn’t like kids. I cannot figure out why anyone would want to be a teacher if they didn’t like kids. Didn’t she know she would have to work with us?

This has been the Word According to Allie.

The week in Thanks

It’s time to join Joy, Kristi and Lizzie to reflect on the week that was, well great when you think about it.

10. Allie has been away all week with a friend, so I got to experience being able to just focus on Boo.

9. Boo’s school had a car wash for Zach this weekend. About 20 6-8th graders were there washing cars to raise money for this little boy. Zach is now half-way to his goal.

8. No one complained about the state of their car after the kids “washed” it.

That’s Boo “helping” her friends

7. I won two blogging awards / recognition from two great fellow bloggers. I promise to respond soon!

6. With David working a lot of overtime and Allie at our friends house, the house has stayed clean this week. Leaving very little laundry or housework to do this weekend.

5. Boo has moved from her Austin and Allie obsession to Phineas & Ferb

4. I discovered Bacardi’s pre-mixed Mojito’s. YUM

3.  Boo slept until 9am this morning.

2. I was asked to do my first guest blog

1. That as much as I miss Allie this week, I know she is having the time of her life. So I am thankful twice to our friend!

What are you thankful for this week?

Ten Things of Thankful

I close my eyes…

Why do we close our eyes when we wish? (another question for the Almighty or Google or hey Lizzie)

The problem with wishes, really is that we always want more. We are never satisfied with the one wish. Ask Allie to use three wishes and first wish is for a thousand more. Kind of like life. I am never satisfied with what I have. Instead I always want more.

I have a great job. But I wanted a college degree to feel complete. Why? I still have the same job I had before the degree. Sure, with more responsibility but really I would have gotten the extra work without the degree. More importantly, without the debt!

We had a nice house. But we wanted more, so we bought land and built our dream house. Once the house was built, that should be it. Right? But just 10 years later we think of all the things we should have done or would have changes.

We have cars that drive us to where we need to be. But we are always on the look out for the next car, who will replace theirs first? (um, me please since mine is the oldest!) Instead of just having a car that can take us from point A to point B we need one with a GPS (because we are too good to read a map), a stereo, DVD player and let’s not forget the heated seats so our precious rear ends don’t get a chill. A point of honesty, my car has none of those things–other than the stereo but guess what? My next car probably will!

We just upgraded our phones to the IPHONE. Why? Our old phones still worked we could talk and text. But we wanted more than that. Okay, I did. David could care less about staying connected. He uses his IPHONE for the weather and fire stuff. Me? I play words with friends.

I have two great girls, but I always want more for them. I want to be a better mom, the one they deserve. Oh, and  I want Boo not have to have so much therapy and to no throw her shoes out the car window.

Yes, she did it AGAIN!!! Yesterday she managed to throw the shoe out the front passenger window from the back seat.  David actually went back and found it.

I have a good marriage, but I want it to be great. I don’t want to have to work so hard at being a wife. I look at other marriages that seem so in sync that seem so effortless. Probably not from their point of view. But I want that easy relationship we had before children and mortgages and car payments.

I live in a great Country. But I want more for it. I want us to live up to the Constitution and what the vision of the Founding Fathers had in mind. That we are all equal and deserve to keep for what we work. That those who defend our country deserve more respect and attention than those who are on television.

As you see, I have a lot of wishes. But if I could only have one wish I would close my eyes and wish to be content with where I am in life.


  What would you wish for and no you cannot say more wishes!


Things that make me think…

Do you ever wonder what the heck was God thinking? And YES I know we are not supposed to question the Almighty. But I do, all the time. A while ago Rich contemplated God on the throne and then Kate thought it would be cool if He came to dinner and out burped Maria.

Their posts made me think, wouldn’t it be cool to pick God’s brain and try to figure out what he was thinking?  Here are just some things that I’d like to ask.

Bugs, as in ticks and spiders and mosquitos. Any bug really. Well not the pretty ones, like butterflies (are they considered bugs?) but the ugly creepy ones.

Why people run or work out in full make-up?

What is up with pedophiles? I mean I get free will and all that. But don’t you have a lightening bolt for a divine I’m going to kick your ass because your an ass button?

Why would He allow a couple to name their child North West, Apple or for Heaven’s sake Moon Unit?

If God is responsible for language why is the F word taboo?

Why it only rains when we camp?

How come when you take a tent out of the box it doesn’t fit back in?

Why I cannot grow grass but my weeds flourish with my watering?

Why celebrities receive more media attention than our soldiers?

Where is that runner’s high I keep hearing about?

Why do children suffer (If he answers that one I will pass it on, Sylvia)?

When man goes to space to see what else is out there, do you ever want to ask why the home you made wasn’t good enough?

How come the shower gets dirty? I mean, really if we are in there getting clean should the shower remain so?

Where is the end of the rainbow?

When you hear parents yell at their children to clean their room, do you ever think to yourself: Have you seen your World?

How about you, what would you like to ask God if he came to dinner?

Thanks, it’s been a great week

It is very difficult, some weeks, to be thankful. Heck, some minutes days are tough to get through.

But this week, was awesome. Sure it wasn’t perfect. Yet I have so much to be grateful. Trust me this list is in no particular order. Every single moment I am just in awe of the week that was.

10. I stopped by a friend’s house to do some PTA business. That was accomplished in under 5 minutes. Minute 6, Allie was in their pool. Minute 8, I had a Margarita in my hand. A routine night at home alone with the girls morphed into a lovely night at a friends house.

9. The freeloading second niece was born! Thankfully the two nieces have two different names and birthdays.

8. We have a wedding this weekend. An adult only wedding, mind you. One that I already have a dress for, so I won’t have to go shopping (okay, David is the probably thankful for that one). I just hope I don’t laugh through it.

7. This virtual world of Blog, where connections are made and kept. I adore how we check in on one another, how we support, love, cry and laugh together. If only we could figure out a way to meet for happy hour.

6. The fact that it is only Tuesday and I have so much to be thankful.

5. Boo who told me she “woe helmet” and “had bike” at school. Translated into she rode on a tricycle at school. Okay,  maybe she was pushed. But it happened and better than that, Boo TOLD me it happened!

4. And better yet, this video. Okay not of her on the bike (hey teachers reading this send me a picture!) but still wicked cool. Not only a sentence but look at the body awareness and motor planning!

3. That even when things don’t go as planned (and I love to plan) I have friends that show me the upside.

2. I am healthy. I spent some time last week with a woman who is suffering from Lupus. She has the most upbeat attitude. She may have Lupus, but Lupus does not have her. In addition, I learned that a young woman I am friends with just learned she has cancer. She has two young children, a supportive family and a great outlook. It is times like these when I know I am blessed to be in good health. I will try to not take it for granted as often as I do.

1. That Zachary is 30% to his goal of receiving security in the form of a Service Animal. If you haven’t had a chance to read his story please see it here. He was also in our local paper, so way to go Zach!

Ten Things of Thankful
What are you thankful for this week? It is easy, when you think about it. Focus on one thing THIS WEEK and let me know in the comments.

Oh and if you are keeping track with me: There are only 46 days left before Allie is back in school. 

5 minutes to Belong

It is time to take 5 minutes and just write without an editor. Ready, Set, Go….


I have long struggled to belong. During the school years I always felt like a misfit. Then after high school I struggled to know where I belonged. Should I go to college and follow the herd or get a job to pay the rent. I chose the job, because well rent has to be paid. Then I struggled with learning how to belong into the adult world.

I have never belonged to my own skin, always wanting to conform to be part of the pack.

When I met David I felt I belonged. I was part of a couple, a team, a family. Then came Allie and I faltered learning how to belong in the world of the mom and the worker. Never really having enough energy for both worlds.

When we had Boo I struggled again to belong. There was no community for an undiagnosed child. Sure there were doctors, therapists and family. But no one who really got it.

Then the world of blog allowed me to belong. I found kinship with other moms who struggle with their children. Allowing me to be Allie’s mom and Boo’s mom. Two different countries but the same world.

Belonging to the world of family has been my saving grace. Belonging, to me, means having purpose. To have similar goals and dreams. I have been blessed with knowing I belong to many worlds. All important, all loved and all supportive.

Belonging doesn’t mean following the pack. It means being secure in yourself so you can share yourself with others.

I have always struggled to belong. I am glad I finally do.


How would you spend 5 minutes to belong?
Five Minute Friday