I’m a know-it-all

I confess that I have a bad habit of knowing what is best for every one. And I mean EVERY ONE. If the World would just listen to me for freaks sake I swear it would be a much nicer place to live.

For example,

If Allie would just listen to me say clean your room and do it, I would not have to enter her room with a Hefty bag. (yes, yes I did)

If I ran the Government it would spend half the amount of money they spend on exploring space on exploring better education opportunities of children we would have less people starring in Teen Mom. Oh and teachers would make a lot more money. Okay, I probably would take away more than 50% of the space funding.  Plus, I am afraid of the aliens in Independence Day. Let’s not invite them over for Sunday dinner.

If people would listen to me when I tell them that we need more forests than parking lots, McMansions, houses and yes Wal-Marts. See, if you build on every spare piece of land imaginable, and then abandon office buildings, etc…of course animals will begin eating out of your bird feeder. It is not the bear’s fault that you moved into his habitat and polluted it. This one is kind of a no-brainer.

If teens would listen to me they would understand a real hero is some one who saves a life, not who hit the home run. They would then be a lot less disappointed when their ‘hero’ gets banned from the sport because they cheated.

If people who are covered in tattoos would listen to me, they would realize that those cool tats are going to look really scary in the nursing home. So get one, maybe. But leave it at that. And think about what you are putting on your body. I mean really, you get a skull tattoo at 19 and then have to explain it to your 4 year old? Listen to me people!

If the World Leaders would listen to me they would understand if they were as polite as our children, learned to share, not break one another’s toys and for goodness sake just play well with others, we would have a lot less war, famine and poverty.

If the drug dealers/makers of the world would listen to me they would take their creative genius and instead of making Crack, Heroin, Ecstasy, etc…they would make Diet Coke less harmful and M&M’s less calories.

If I ran the US, stay at home moms would get a government salary. Not Welfare. But a stipend to allow her to raise her children the best way she knows how. As this works in other countries, I am pretty sure the US can manage it.

Speaking of Welfare, I know just how to reform the system. Stay with me here. Welfare is a good thing. But it is meant to help and support people as they get back on their feet. It is not supposed to take the place of employment. You are not supposed to be able to get your nails done, your hair done or drive a brand new car with the money taken from my wallet in the form of taxes. HOWEVER you are welcome to the money taken from my wallet in the form of taxes to help put food on the table, clothe yourself and your children and have a roof over your head. See the difference? So I would reform the welfare system back into WELL-FAIR. A program to help others and provide them security to care for their families.

If people would just listen to me there would be no discrimination. Back to the kids for a moment, we would look at the sandbox as our children do. That there are friends playing. Not that there is a white, black, purple or kid with a cane playing. Okay, Boo looks at the sandbox as water boarding. So we won’t look at the analogy from her point of view.

If the kids programming listened to me, they would not be dressing the girls as tramps. I am sorry, but I do not know one 12-year old who wears skirts that short or heels that high. Our children would start dressing as children. Fathers would stop saying, “Young lady you are not going out of the house looking like a tramp” and Mom’s would stop saying, “I swear that skirt looked like it covered her ass in the store”.

If the people who thought up the food pyramid added junk food onto it there wouldn’t be so many moms eating brownies in the closet.

If my husband would just admit I am always right BEFORE the argument he wouldn’t have to apologize as much.

And this is how I finished the sentence this Friday, I have a bad habit of…..Personally I cannot wait to read how Rich and Kristi answered this one.

Finish the Sentence Friday




What is your bad habit?



16 thoughts on “I’m a know-it-all

  1. Janine Huldie

    I love how you know it all and in my world you could totally know it all, because it sounds like you have some great ideas here how to tell it just like it is. And I already know how Kristi answered this one (she didn't disappoint as usual) and not sure about Rich (still need to read). Thanks as always for linking up and wishing you a wonderful weekend now!!

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  2. Dana Hemelt

    The world should listen to you, Kerri – your thoughts and ideas are brilliant. And if Allie were your co-leader, the world would be even better. Love your take on FTSF!

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  3. Considerer

    PMPL to your husband's apologies! You're hilarious XD

    (I always kinda thought that if the welfare system was replaced with specific coupons which were only redeemable in certain stores, that could help a lot)

    Here's hoping Rich gets the chance to join in again. Kristi's was quite wonderful.

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  4. Katia

    Kerri, I love your take on this week's topic and I know a lot of people who know everything and are always right, the difference between you and them is that they would never admit to it, which is why I loved your post and I suspect you go about sharing your insight very delicately. I know nothing myself, but I know you're right about your husband. And so am I about mine 🙂

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  5. Kristi Campbell

    The world should listen to you! My husband can learn the same lesson. And of course, you know that my very favorite is the one about everybody being treated with equality. Our kids – and everybody else – deserves it. Guess I better cancel my appointment. I was planning on getting a skull tattoo on my neck tomorrow so I can be cooler. But I want to be friends with you in the nursing home so I am canceling. See? I am listening to you!

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  6. Mocadeaux

    Love it! I think all of your positions are completely reasonable and would, indeed, make the world a better place. Sometimes we need to channel our inner child to see how to really behave, eh?

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  7. K

    I love this!!! And I love YOU too…The world should totally listen to what you have to say. Thank you for all of the wonderful advice that you have given me! xo

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