I’m here…

I’m here because I want to be. Because I have to be “here”. In the now, in the moment. That is my goal in 2015. To not just remember the moments but to live the heck out of them.

I started blogging in June 2012 after finding a blog post by accident. I honestly had no idea what a blog was, but fell in love with the sense of community. I knew Bridget was “special” but wasn’t yet comfortable with her being “special needs”. I felt alone, so alone, that my friends didn’t understand. After three years of navigating the world of the Undiagnosed (yes, I made up a word way back in 2012) I felt like I had something to add to the discussion and created Undiagnosed but Okay.

I had no idea how this little blog that I kept private for almost a year would evolve. Once I went public, once I let family and friends sneak a peak into our lives I was overwhelmed by the outpouring of support. If I hadn’t started this blog, a stranger would never have contacted me with a a physician’s name and an answer to Bridgetitis (another term I made up). It continues to amaze me, how many people understand how difficult it is to have a disabled child, an autistic child, a child with issues and a child whose smile lights up the room. Of how tremendous my village is in supporting every one of us.

Since that first blog post, this medium has evolved. When I began I thought it would center on Bridget, on living with a child who kept us, and the medical establishment, guessing. Like all things, the blog grew to include our family. Sisterly love that defies any of my dreams. Then it evolved again when I realized that protecting Abby’s privacy was more important than my need to share.

To include the My Challenge series where real people shared their struggle. At first glance, some feel mundane (shopping for shoes) while others overwhelming (dealing with postpartum depression). In the end, all of our challenges seems less when they are shared. The shopping for shoes? Is a young woman who has cerebral palsy and the terror that shoe shopping induces.

Regular readers will tell you that as often as I make you cry I make you laugh. That is my hope. To show that there are dark days, but anyone who tells you life is all sunshine and unicorns is probably trying to sell you something.

This post was brought to you by a blog challenge to remind yourself why you write. Thanks for reading.

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