It was not until this week that I realized just how incredible my mother is and how lucky I am to have her in my life.  You see, this happened:

Looking for support I send a desperate text to a few friends with this message: “File this under hat was I thinking? And no, alcohol was not involved.” Their response varied from ROFLMAO to LOL to LMAOOOOOOO to hard to believe alcohol was NOT a factor and my all-time favorite:

Abby: Mom please don’t hurt yourself.

People, I went willingly of my own volition to a crap craft store and spent forty dollars. FORTY DOLLARS along with six hours of my night trying to teach myself how to crochet. What caused this sober moment insanity? Could it be that I was out of wine and that led to dangerous decisions?  Maybe. Could it be I was feeling nostalgic that my mother crochets/David’s mother knits and I was feeling that the art would be dying off soon? Not that I wish them dead soon or anything.

No the blame lies with having friends. Yes, my friends made me do it. Sure they are good people. My friends are incredibly kind and sweet. It’s just that they won’t stop giving birth. Every time one of them announces their pregnancy I get on the phone with my mother and order up 2-4 blankets, just so I will always have a spare. Cause you know pregnant women multiply.

Anyway, back to my saga, I just gave the last blanket to a dear friend. I started feeling guilty about not making them myself (yes, I always give credit to my mother). I have a friend who is on vacation sure to come home with baby number 2 on board and thought, what the hell. I have at least six months before it would be needed. I’ve seen my mom whip out a blanket in under a week. After all, children crochet so how hard could this be?

It’s freaking hard and expensive that’s what it is! FORTY DOLLARS PEOPLE! Now I’m feeling guilty that the gift cards I gave to my mom to pay for the blankets barely covered their cost. I’m determined though. I finally got the hang of the chain. Now I just have to figure out how to work backwards so I don’t end up with one very thin line of a blanket. Maybe it will just be garland. That might be cute, right?

After TWO nights of crocheting

On the upside I’m visiting my mom in a few weeks. Where I will bring my FORTY DOLLARS worth of crap yarn  and beg her to show me how to crochet. Or maybe I will just pour some wine, hand her the yarn and give thanks that my mom rocks a baby blanket like no other.