Joining some friends to reflect on the past week and focus on the great things that happened. But then I kind of had a crazy week so figured I would have some fun….

T Turkeys. I know what you are thinking, turkeys? But yes. You see I had about 18 in my yard this week. This means come Thanksgiving I won’t have to go grocery shopping. As Boo said when she saw them: BOOM

I     Ice cold Mojitos and Margaritas

G   Girl goes back to school in 25 days

S Shark Week the only week of programming David and Allie don’t fight over the remote

What are you thankful for this week?

I confess that I have a bad habit of knowing what is best for every one. And I mean EVERY ONE. If the World would just listen to me for freaks sake I swear it would be a much nicer place to live.

For example,

If Allie would just listen to me say clean your room and do it, I would not have to enter her room with a Hefty bag. (yes, yes I did)

If I ran the Government it would spend half the amount of money they spend on exploring space on exploring better education opportunities of children we would have less people starring in Teen Mom. Oh and teachers would make a lot more money. Okay, I probably would take away more than 50% of the space funding.  Plus, I am afraid of the aliens in Independence Day. Let’s not invite them over for Sunday dinner.

If people would listen to me when I tell them that we need more forests than parking lots, McMansions, houses and yes Wal-Marts. See, if you build on every spare piece of land imaginable, and then abandon office buildings, etc…of course animals will begin eating out of your bird feeder. It is not the bear’s fault that you moved into his habitat and polluted it. This one is kind of a no-brainer.

If teens would listen to me they would understand a real hero is some one who saves a life, not who hit the home run. They would then be a lot less disappointed when their ‘hero’ gets banned from the sport because they cheated.

If people who are covered in tattoos would listen to me, they would realize that those cool tats are going to look really scary in the nursing home. So get one, maybe. But leave it at that. And think about what you are putting on your body. I mean really, you get a skull tattoo at 19 and then have to explain it to your 4 year old? Listen to me people!

If the World Leaders would listen to me they would understand if they were as polite as our children, learned to share, not break one another’s toys and for goodness sake just play well with others, we would have a lot less war, famine and poverty.

If the drug dealers/makers of the world would listen to me they would take their creative genius and instead of making Crack, Heroin, Ecstasy, etc…they would make Diet Coke less harmful and M&M’s less calories.

If I ran the US, stay at home moms would get a government salary. Not Welfare. But a stipend to allow her to raise her children the best way she knows how. As this works in other countries, I am pretty sure the US can manage it.

Speaking of Welfare, I know just how to reform the system. Stay with me here. Welfare is a good thing. But it is meant to help and support people as they get back on their feet. It is not supposed to take the place of employment. You are not supposed to be able to get your nails done, your hair done or drive a brand new car with the money taken from my wallet in the form of taxes. HOWEVER you are welcome to the money taken from my wallet in the form of taxes to help put food on the table, clothe yourself and your children and have a roof over your head. See the difference? So I would reform the welfare system back into WELL-FAIR. A program to help others and provide them security to care for their families.

If people would just listen to me there would be no discrimination. Back to the kids for a moment, we would look at the sandbox as our children do. That there are friends playing. Not that there is a white, black, purple or kid with a cane playing. Okay, Boo looks at the sandbox as water boarding. So we won’t look at the analogy from her point of view.

If the kids programming listened to me, they would not be dressing the girls as tramps. I am sorry, but I do not know one 12-year old who wears skirts that short or heels that high. Our children would start dressing as children. Fathers would stop saying, “Young lady you are not going out of the house looking like a tramp” and Mom’s would stop saying, “I swear that skirt looked like it covered her ass in the store”.

If the people who thought up the food pyramid added junk food onto it there wouldn’t be so many moms eating brownies in the closet.

If my husband would just admit I am always right BEFORE the argument he wouldn’t have to apologize as much.

And this is how I finished the sentence this Friday, I have a bad habit of…..Personally I cannot wait to read how Rich and Kristi answered this one.

What is your bad habit?

A while ago I asked a bunch of you the secrets of potty training. Allie was relatively easy. See she HAD to be trained by 2.9 otherwise she would not be able to go to preschool. I took 9 months to train her. Not the entire 9 months but I gave myself time and patience.

I personally think potty training is the hardest thing in the world to teach a child. I mean really how can you explain that your bladder is full, let alone that the sensation you currently feel running down your leg is pee?

It is trial and error. Allie was kind of easy. It took a bit, but she got it.

Boo scared the crap out of me. Okay, not literally. Well maybe.

Then she started showing interest in the potty. She is so petite the toilet wasn’t stabilizing enough for her. So I did something I swore I would NEVER do and went and got the dreaded….

Yup, I caved and got the potty chair. Now before you judge, I just never got it. To me having a portable toilet that the kid can move into the kitchen (ew), the living room or the bedroom (ewe) was more than I can handle.

Here is where Boo’s sense of order comes into play. She KNOWS that the potty remains in the bathroom. Thank the good Lord and all that is Holy.

I worked with her school, they have a training regimen they were willing to try. So last Monday Boo went to school in her big girl panties. Okay, she went to school in her diaper with big girl panties in her bag.

And she did it.

The first time they put her on the toilet she went. Then she went again and again.

It has been a little over a week and she hasn’t had an accident. Okay, she has had one accident. But I wasn’t home with her when it happened. I am not blaming the dad person who was home at the time…..I’m just saying that Boo continues to amaze me.

I am in awe.

This little girl who cannot tell me if she is hungry, tired or why she is hitting her head has enough understanding of her body to know that she has to go.

She goes on a schedule, but she also tells us to “ome ere” and will bring us into the bathroom. Okay, too much information.

But I am one proud mama.

While visiting family this weekend Allie had the unexpected surprise of adventure.  Believe it or not, this is in someone’s backyard. He should be featured on extreme tree houses.

Of course Dad had to take a ride

And Mom had to make sure it was safe

Allie now is trying to convince us that we should have one of these at our house. She invited our friend to come live with us and build her one.

 Boo hid in the garage and told us all to be CA-FUL. 

If I were to make a mix-tape for Tia, someone who deserves a tape for something they did, it would have to include:

Something by Cher because, well she rocks just like Tia does.

Wind beneath my wings by Bette Midler because I remember crying through that movie with her. Tia, not Bette

You’re my best friend by Queen just in case she forgot

Grade 9 by the Barenaked Ladies because well if we were making a mix tape it would have been when we were in grade 9

Don’t you forget about me by Simple Minds because every time I hear that song I think about her. And again, hey grade 9

Now admit it you thought it was a different kind of tape I was talking about, didn’t you?

Allie: Momma you are the best mom ever.
Me: Aw, thanks Allie
Allie: And I am not just saying that so you will let me stay up until 8:30.

I think this is probably my favorite “hop” of the week. When Kristi, Joy and Lizzie remind me to look back at just this week and realize not only did we survive but it wasn’t as bad as it seemed.

10. Allie came home. Sure the house is louder and messier. But to listen to her teach Boo how to “tag” is priceless.

9. The Royal Boy was born. Thank goodness. I was really worried that all those reporters outside the hospital were beginning to stink.

8. I ran 2.8 miles without walking.

7. We had a dinner out with Boo’s previous OT, without Boo. Best news? The conversation didn’t center around Boo. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

6. This weekend we are visiting David’s cousins for a mini-family reunion. They live in a barn. It is way cool.

5. Allie is thankful there is a pool here.

4. Boo picked up the butcher knife I was using to cut cantaloupe and I got it back from her before she cut her hand off.

3. I  got talk to my bloggy friend in real life this week. Thanks Kristi for making the conversation as easy as I thought it would be. Even if you don’t sound like Gidget.

2. I have been “off” Diet Coke for 3 & 1/2 Months (and 23 days, 6 hours, 2 minutes)

1. The thing I am most thankful this weekend is Kerry. Who made me see how my emotions affect Boo. I owe you more than a plate of Fried Clams.

What are you thankful for this week? Come on it is not that difficult to think of ONE thing.

I never really thought about a bucket list. Since I am way past my familial half-life, I figure I better get it written down! Which was a lot harder than I thought.

Before I die I would like to accomplish the following things:

1. An African Safari
2. To hike the Knife’s Edge
3. To sleep through the night (yeah, I know seems lame but true)
4. To go across the country, visiting every State.
5. To find the end of the rainbow (see, it’s probably in my dreams)
6. To travel to Italy
7. To figure out how to meditate. Seriously, you should see me in a yoga class!
8. To have Dana, Kristi and Kate over for a glass of meet in person wine.
9. To figure out a way for Joy to join us or go to Germany for one of her cocktails
10. Understand why Honey Boo Boo, the Kardashians and Candy freaking Crush are so popular.
11. Meet Kerry for fried clams
12. To visit Bron in Australia. Okay, I really want to visit Australia but I think Bron and her family would be awesome tour guides.
13. To Sail in the Caribbean, for at least a year.
14. To find that Runner’s High

I feel the need to apologize as my list is so greedy and not spread peace, joy and happiness. But oh well, can’t be perfect all the time!

So what is on your bucket list?

Kerry at Transcending CP is a beautiful young woman who someday is going to change the world one child (and parent) at a time. She writes from the heart, as a child who has CP. On how CP not only affects her but her family. The good, the bad and the memories that make me want to go back in time and punch a jerk in the nose.

Last weekend she wrote about the Pain of Disability. It brought me, and a lot of other moms, to tears. It was both beautiful and heartbreaking. Tatum responded with a wonderful letter to our children. And these two posts brought me to this moment….




My Boo,

I adore you. You bring me such joy and peace. The moments in life where I feel the most contentment is when you are in my arms, with your head on my shoulder and your arms around my neck.

I apologize for the pain I have caused you with the hospitalizations, the horrid EEG testing, being the person who had to hold you down for lab work, X-rays, MRIs and IVs. I am sorry for the pain you have endured in your four short years.

I worry that the hours of therapy are too much for you. I wonder if by having you in all the therapies and medical procedures I am changing the child you were supposed to be. That you are working so hard for me, rather than for yourself.

I know you do not understand why you had to work so hard. To speak, to eat, to roll over, to walk. That when the other children run around a party and you cannot keep up it makes you sad. It makes me sad, too. But for different reasons.

When you saw me cry, when you heard me say “how much more can she take”, when you saw me break…my pain was not caused by you. Rather it was caused by knowing I was not Super Mom.

You see, Boo (and Kerry, Tucker, Owen, Sami, Cooper, the Boyz and Sunny or insert your child’s name here) as your mom I am supposed to be able to take away your pain. I am supposed to make life easy for you. Well, not easy. I am supposed to be molding you into the great person you will become.

But I am not supposed to hurt you.

A mom wants to be seen as a hero. As a miracle maker. The one who makes Fairies come to life, inhabits the role of Santa and jumps buildings in a single bound.

Being your mom has enriched my life in ways you cannot imagine. I have become an advocate, I have become a writer, I have become knowledgeable in medical terms I never would have learned. I have become something more.

More than Kerri. More than a wife and truthfully more than a mom. And none of that would have happened without you.

Boo, I do not regret one single moment of being your mom. I cannot imagine my life without you. When you were in the NICU I left you one night for five hours. The nurses convinced me to go home and get clothes, see your sister. I cried the entire time I was away from you. I still cannot listen to Carrie Underwood’s This was Just a Dream.

You were only five days old. I had seen you almost die twice and I swore in that moment that I would never leave you again. I would never again leave you to the mercy of medical staff without being there to hold your little hand.

Even if that meant I was the one holding you down for the test.

Boo you are my hero. You have defied the doctors who said you would not walk, talk or grow. You have defied my limited dreams of what to expect. At four years old you continue to amaze me every day.

I am so proud of you. Most children, heck most people do not have to work as hard as you do every day. They take their health for granted. They do not see the wonder when their child who has worked for a year to jump, manages to jump with a smile on her face.


Do not for one minute think that it is you who have caused my tears. You, my Boo, have made me believe in miracles.

Thank you for choosing me to be your mom.

Love,
Me.

PS–Dearest Kerry, thank you for writing your post. It reminded me that how I respond to Boo’s life has impact on her. I will remember to focus on the miracles and not so much on the pain. I hope she never feels that she has caused me pain, because the truth is she (and YOU) have only brought me joy.

How do you get voted the favorite parent?

Take Allie out to Friendly’s while Mom is at work and Boo is at school. In the words of a friend: Well Played, David. Well, Played.