I think this is probably my favorite “hop” of the week. When Kristi, Joy and Lizzie remind me to look back at just this week and realize not only did we survive but it wasn’t as bad as it seemed.

10. Allie came home. Sure the house is louder and messier. But to listen to her teach Boo how to “tag” is priceless.

9. The Royal Boy was born. Thank goodness. I was really worried that all those reporters outside the hospital were beginning to stink.

8. I ran 2.8 miles without walking.

7. We had a dinner out with Boo’s previous OT, without Boo. Best news? The conversation didn’t center around Boo. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

6. This weekend we are visiting David’s cousins for a mini-family reunion. They live in a barn. It is way cool.

5. Allie is thankful there is a pool here.

4. Boo picked up the butcher knife I was using to cut cantaloupe and I got it back from her before she cut her hand off.

3. I  got talk to my bloggy friend in real life this week. Thanks Kristi for making the conversation as easy as I thought it would be. Even if you don’t sound like Gidget.

2. I have been “off” Diet Coke for 3 & 1/2 Months (and 23 days, 6 hours, 2 minutes)

1. The thing I am most thankful this weekend is Kerry. Who made me see how my emotions affect Boo. I owe you more than a plate of Fried Clams.

What are you thankful for this week? Come on it is not that difficult to think of ONE thing.

I never really thought about a bucket list. Since I am way past my familial half-life, I figure I better get it written down! Which was a lot harder than I thought.

Before I die I would like to accomplish the following things:

1. An African Safari
2. To hike the Knife’s Edge
3. To sleep through the night (yeah, I know seems lame but true)
4. To go across the country, visiting every State.
5. To find the end of the rainbow (see, it’s probably in my dreams)
6. To travel to Italy
7. To figure out how to meditate. Seriously, you should see me in a yoga class!
8. To have Dana, Kristi and Kate over for a glass of meet in person wine.
9. To figure out a way for Joy to join us or go to Germany for one of her cocktails
10. Understand why Honey Boo Boo, the Kardashians and Candy freaking Crush are so popular.
11. Meet Kerry for fried clams
12. To visit Bron in Australia. Okay, I really want to visit Australia but I think Bron and her family would be awesome tour guides.
13. To Sail in the Caribbean, for at least a year.
14. To find that Runner’s High

I feel the need to apologize as my list is so greedy and not spread peace, joy and happiness. But oh well, can’t be perfect all the time!

So what is on your bucket list?

Kerry at Transcending CP is a beautiful young woman who someday is going to change the world one child (and parent) at a time. She writes from the heart, as a child who has CP. On how CP not only affects her but her family. The good, the bad and the memories that make me want to go back in time and punch a jerk in the nose.

Last weekend she wrote about the Pain of Disability. It brought me, and a lot of other moms, to tears. It was both beautiful and heartbreaking. Tatum responded with a wonderful letter to our children. And these two posts brought me to this moment….




My Boo,

I adore you. You bring me such joy and peace. The moments in life where I feel the most contentment is when you are in my arms, with your head on my shoulder and your arms around my neck.

I apologize for the pain I have caused you with the hospitalizations, the horrid EEG testing, being the person who had to hold you down for lab work, X-rays, MRIs and IVs. I am sorry for the pain you have endured in your four short years.

I worry that the hours of therapy are too much for you. I wonder if by having you in all the therapies and medical procedures I am changing the child you were supposed to be. That you are working so hard for me, rather than for yourself.

I know you do not understand why you had to work so hard. To speak, to eat, to roll over, to walk. That when the other children run around a party and you cannot keep up it makes you sad. It makes me sad, too. But for different reasons.

When you saw me cry, when you heard me say “how much more can she take”, when you saw me break…my pain was not caused by you. Rather it was caused by knowing I was not Super Mom.

You see, Boo (and Kerry, Tucker, Owen, Sami, Cooper, the Boyz and Sunny or insert your child’s name here) as your mom I am supposed to be able to take away your pain. I am supposed to make life easy for you. Well, not easy. I am supposed to be molding you into the great person you will become.

But I am not supposed to hurt you.

A mom wants to be seen as a hero. As a miracle maker. The one who makes Fairies come to life, inhabits the role of Santa and jumps buildings in a single bound.

Being your mom has enriched my life in ways you cannot imagine. I have become an advocate, I have become a writer, I have become knowledgeable in medical terms I never would have learned. I have become something more.

More than Kerri. More than a wife and truthfully more than a mom. And none of that would have happened without you.

Boo, I do not regret one single moment of being your mom. I cannot imagine my life without you. When you were in the NICU I left you one night for five hours. The nurses convinced me to go home and get clothes, see your sister. I cried the entire time I was away from you. I still cannot listen to Carrie Underwood’s This was Just a Dream.

You were only five days old. I had seen you almost die twice and I swore in that moment that I would never leave you again. I would never again leave you to the mercy of medical staff without being there to hold your little hand.

Even if that meant I was the one holding you down for the test.

Boo you are my hero. You have defied the doctors who said you would not walk, talk or grow. You have defied my limited dreams of what to expect. At four years old you continue to amaze me every day.

I am so proud of you. Most children, heck most people do not have to work as hard as you do every day. They take their health for granted. They do not see the wonder when their child who has worked for a year to jump, manages to jump with a smile on her face.


Do not for one minute think that it is you who have caused my tears. You, my Boo, have made me believe in miracles.

Thank you for choosing me to be your mom.

Love,
Me.

PS–Dearest Kerry, thank you for writing your post. It reminded me that how I respond to Boo’s life has impact on her. I will remember to focus on the miracles and not so much on the pain. I hope she never feels that she has caused me pain, because the truth is she (and YOU) have only brought me joy.

How do you get voted the favorite parent?

Take Allie out to Friendly’s while Mom is at work and Boo is at school. In the words of a friend: Well Played, David. Well, Played.

We have a great friend Tante (as Allie calls her). She is my old landlady, the one you always hope to have when you are young and in your twenties. She made me homemade cookies and minestrone soup. She taught me how to use a wood stove and how to be a young woman without the benefit of leaning on a man to do things for me. She laid the foundation, that took me years to build on, that liking myself was more important than hoping some one else would.

That and a few more reasons is why we adopted her into our clan. Tante is retired, has no children and her family is back in Canada. Over the past few summers she has taken Allie for the day. They have had great adventures, once renting a Jeep on the Vineyard for the day. (Allie’s only complaint was Tante’s friends forgot to talk to her in English).

This year, Allie had her first overnight. And then another and another. Last weekend we had a wedding just down the street from Tante’s home. She offered to babysit the girls for us and we jumped at the chance to go to an adult wedding and be adults.

When we went to pick the girls up that night Allie informed us she was staying. Apparently she had snuck her toothbrush, comb, clothes and all important Mimi (favored stuffed animal) into her backpack of “stuff” she just had to bring with her. We made plans to pick her up two days later.

Only to be told she would be home in September. And here is why:

They have been to the beach. The movies. Mini-golf. The beach. Pottery, yoga and pilates classes. The beach. They have ridden in bumper boats, explored museums and talked as long as Allie’s eyes have remained open. They have done their nails and read books together. Ice cream and dinners out. The beach. They have had sleep overs in every bed in the house.

Including the one in my old apartment.

When she calls at night she is so full of joy and so excited to fill me in.

Tante is giving Allie all the time and adventures we cannot. Not just because of Boo. Partly, if I am honest. There are a lot of activities we pass by knowing Boo will have a panic attack, especially the beach. But even if we take Boo out of the equation I do not know if I would take a week off of work to have a stay-cation. My vacation time is already planned for family time and Boo’s appointments.

When I was a little older than Allie, I had a favored Aunt that did for me what Tante is doing for Allie. I think every child should have that person in their life.

We are incredible thankful to Tante for loving Allie the way she does. For taking a week out of her summer to spoil a little girl who is just as happy sitting at the beach as she is playing mini-golf.

But I miss my girl. A week and a half is long enough. So she is coming home tomorrow.

I am sure by 7pm my ears will be bleeding as she tells me about her week.

And I will listen with a smile on my face, knowing I can send her back anytime!
 

It is Monday, and time to hear the Word of Allie.

Allie has been lucky to have wonderful teachers most of her life. She was a little nervous about her upcoming 4th grade teacher. She didn’t not get her first choice. But was very thankful that she received her second choice.

I asked her why she didn’t want Teacher X. I mean, really, how much could she know about the upcoming teachers?


Allie: Well, you see she doesn’t like kids. I cannot figure out why anyone would want to be a teacher if they didn’t like kids. Didn’t she know she would have to work with us?

This has been the Word According to Allie.

It’s time to join Joy, Kristi and Lizzie to reflect on the week that was, well great when you think about it.

10. Allie has been away all week with a friend, so I got to experience being able to just focus on Boo.

9. Boo’s school had a car wash for Zach this weekend. About 20 6-8th graders were there washing cars to raise money for this little boy. Zach is now half-way to his goal.

8. No one complained about the state of their car after the kids “washed” it.

That’s Boo “helping” her friends

7. I won two blogging awards / recognition from two great fellow bloggers. I promise to respond soon!

6. With David working a lot of overtime and Allie at our friends house, the house has stayed clean this week. Leaving very little laundry or housework to do this weekend.

5. Boo has moved from her Austin and Allie obsession to Phineas & Ferb

4. I discovered Bacardi’s pre-mixed Mojito’s. YUM

3.  Boo slept until 9am this morning.

2. I was asked to do my first guest blog

1. That as much as I miss Allie this week, I know she is having the time of her life. So I am thankful twice to our friend!

What are you thankful for this week?

Why do we close our eyes when we wish? (another question for the Almighty or Google or hey Lizzie)

The problem with wishes, really is that we always want more. We are never satisfied with the one wish. Ask Allie to use three wishes and first wish is for a thousand more. Kind of like life. I am never satisfied with what I have. Instead I always want more.

I have a great job. But I wanted a college degree to feel complete. Why? I still have the same job I had before the degree. Sure, with more responsibility but really I would have gotten the extra work without the degree. More importantly, without the debt!

Do you ever wonder what the heck was God thinking? And YES I know we are not supposed to question the Almighty. But I do, all the time. A while ago Rich contemplated God on the throne and then Kate thought it would be cool if He came to dinner and out burped Maria.

Their posts made me think, wouldn’t it be cool to pick God’s brain and try to figure out what he was thinking?  Here are just some things that I’d like to ask.



Bugs, as in ticks and spiders and mosquitos. Any bug really. Well not the pretty ones, like butterflies (are they considered bugs?) but the ugly creepy ones.

Why people run or work out in full make-up?

What is up with pedophiles? I mean I get free will and all that. But don’t you have a lightening bolt for a divine I’m going to kick your ass because your an ass button?

Why would He allow a couple to name their child North West, Apple or for Heaven’s sake Moon Unit?

If God is responsible for language why is the F word taboo?

Why it only rains when we camp?

How come when you take a tent out of the box it doesn’t fit back in?

Why I cannot grow grass but my weeds flourish with my watering?

Why celebrities receive more media attention than our soldiers?

Where is that runner’s high I keep hearing about?

Why do children suffer (If he answers that one I will pass it on, Sylvia)?

When man goes to space to see what else is out there, do you ever want to ask why the home you made wasn’t good enough?

How come the shower gets dirty? I mean, really if we are in there getting clean should the shower remain so?

Where is the end of the rainbow?

When you hear parents yell at their children to clean their room, do you ever think to yourself: Have you seen your World?


How about you, what would you like to ask God if he came to dinner?

It is very difficult, some weeks, to be thankful. Heck, some minutes days are tough to get through.

But this week, was awesome. Sure it wasn’t perfect. Yet I have so much to be grateful. Trust me this list is in no particular order. Every single moment I am just in awe of the week that was.

10. I stopped by a friend’s house to do some PTA business. That was accomplished in under 5 minutes. Minute 6, Allie was in their pool. Minute 8, I had a Margarita in my hand. A routine night at home alone with the girls morphed into a lovely night at a friends house.

9. The freeloading second niece was born! Thankfully the two nieces have two different names and birthdays.

8. We have a wedding this weekend. An adult only wedding, mind you. One that I already have a dress for, so I won’t have to go shopping (okay, David is the probably thankful for that one). I just hope I don’t laugh through it.

7. This virtual world of Blog, where connections are made and kept. I adore how we check in on one another, how we support, love, cry and laugh together. If only we could figure out a way to meet for happy hour.

6. The fact that it is only Tuesday and I have so much to be thankful.

5. Boo who told me she “woe helmet” and “had bike” at school. Translated into she rode on a tricycle at school. Okay,  maybe she was pushed. But it happened and better than that, Boo TOLD me it happened!

4. And better yet, this video. Okay not of her on the bike (hey teachers reading this send me a picture!) but still wicked cool. Not only a sentence but look at the body awareness and motor planning!

3. That even when things don’t go as planned (and I love to plan) I have friends that show me the upside.

2. I am healthy. I spent some time last week with a woman who is suffering from Lupus. She has the most upbeat attitude. She may have Lupus, but Lupus does not have her. In addition, I learned that a young woman I am friends with just learned she has cancer. She has two young children, a supportive family and a great outlook. It is times like these when I know I am blessed to be in good health. I will try to not take it for granted as often as I do.

1. That Zachary is 30% to his goal of receiving security in the form of a Service Animal. If you haven’t had a chance to read his story please see it here. He was also in our local paper, so way to go Zach!