Over the weekend we visited David’s cousins in Vermont. It was a gorgeous weekend and since I like messing with my husband I signed him up for a 5k without warning him.

I figure if I don’t let him train I have half a chance of beating him. Yeah, right.

We left the girls with the family and headed off to the race. This was the first time we ever raced when we didn’t know the locale. I was thinking bonus points for adventure. David thought idiot points for not being able to find the start of the race.

We finally find the sign-in station and are told the race begins in 5 minutes.  Plenty of time, right? Well as I am tying my sneakers back at the car we hear READY SET GO….

We hurry down to the start, in dead last, with the announcer saying you can catch up. Which we did, until we figured out that there were no signs telling us which way to go. We begin staying in the middle of the pack, moving slowly out of dead last. Except we were not the only ones lost. Even the locals got confused. As we headed into the ghetto neighborhoods we quickly see a woman running back towards us saying, GO THE OTHER WAY!!!!!!

We get through mile one. Not that there was a sign to tell us, thank goodness for Nike+ Run, at my fastest pace yet.

As we start looping back to the center of town and figure out that we know where we are going David begins leaving me in the dust. See we thought we knew where the finish line was. So he slowly began edging to the front of the pack. This was fine, because there were still people for me to follow.

Except we were only at mile 2. At this point I can no longer see David, but there are a couple of people in front of me to show me the way. If only the finish line was where I thought it was. As I turned the corner really thinking this was it, I was done. I hadn’t walked once and my reward was finishing the race not in dead last and not in the wrong part of town.

Then I lost my focal point. She either ducked into a store or was a figment of my imagination all this time. I am at a T in the road. I either have to go right or left. Since the course went in a zig zag pattern I have no freaking idea where to turn. I look behind me and see a nice woman running behind me. I ask, Which way do we go? And she replies:

I think to the right.

You think? Okay, let’s go for it. We do the last mile of the race more or less together with no one else to be found. As we finish the last freaking hill (why are there hills at the end of a race) I round the corner to see David running back towards me.

Oh crap, I think. Now he is lost.

Nope, he was just running back to make sure I figured out which way to go. I finish the race behind David, but with my best time ever. Only to find out that the race not only did not finish where I thought it was going to, it also finished a half-mile away from our starting point. Which is just not fair.

I learned a couple of things with this race:

• David is just humoring me by running at my pace.
• Races should have clear signs telling us where to go
• When you run through a possible ghetto you will run faster, even up a hill
• When you are lost there will be some one nice to say GO RIGHT
• A banana never tasted so go than at the end of a 5k

Hey everyone

My friend Joy at I can Say Mama is vacationing with Maria in beautiful Austria. Okay not really with the Von Trapps, but with real best buddies. While she is visiting with friends and showing her beautiful son, Sunny, off she asked me to make sure now one rummaged threw her house.

So of course I said I would. Who wouldn’t want to pretend they were in Germany keeping the blog fires burning?  As I blog-sit for her I swear the Hills are alive with the Sound of Music. 

Please take a moment and visit me over at Joy’s. She has a great blog, so while she is away you should poke into her older blogs and find out more about her incredible journey as Sunny’s mom.

Now come on and sing it with me…Doe a deer a female deer, ray a drop of golden sun….

Recently I was belting out my portion of a duet with the radio, looked over and realized that hey it’s summer and my windows are open. Sorry about that….

All Summer Long by Kid Rock with Leonard Skynard

Summer Nights by Danny and Sandy

(I still swoon over Kinicki though)


Knee Deep by the Zac Brown Band and Jimmy Buffett

Cause wouldn’t you love to be knee deep in the water with your ass in the sand?

Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men

The video is freaky, I always imagined it more of a Ghost theme with Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze (again, swoon……)

And what summer wouldn’t be perfect with a little P!NK? She has so many rocking duets but to just pick one so I follow the rules this week…..

How about some True Love?

This post has been brought to you by the ultimate mix-tape DJ Jen Kehl and her cohort in music crime, Kristi. Hey Jen, I actually did the theme right this week! Except I got concerned after reading her post I was supposed to do a James Taylor theme.

This weekend Allie and her friend were playing the game of Life. Yes, the game is still around. Allie was all excited that she got a husband. Not being able to resist, I asked her since boys were ‘gross’ why she was happy about the husband.

“Well, I figure if I have a husband I can just stay home and do the stuff I enjoy all day. He can go to work and not annoy me”.

Let me know how that works out for you, kid.

Joining some friends to reflect on the past week and focus on the great things that happened. But then I kind of had a crazy week so figured I would have some fun….

T Turkeys. I know what you are thinking, turkeys? But yes. You see I had about 18 in my yard this week. This means come Thanksgiving I won’t have to go grocery shopping. As Boo said when she saw them: BOOM

I     Ice cold Mojitos and Margaritas

G   Girl goes back to school in 25 days

S Shark Week the only week of programming David and Allie don’t fight over the remote

What are you thankful for this week?

I confess that I have a bad habit of knowing what is best for every one. And I mean EVERY ONE. If the World would just listen to me for freaks sake I swear it would be a much nicer place to live.

For example,

If Allie would just listen to me say clean your room and do it, I would not have to enter her room with a Hefty bag. (yes, yes I did)

If I ran the Government it would spend half the amount of money they spend on exploring space on exploring better education opportunities of children we would have less people starring in Teen Mom. Oh and teachers would make a lot more money. Okay, I probably would take away more than 50% of the space funding.  Plus, I am afraid of the aliens in Independence Day. Let’s not invite them over for Sunday dinner.

If people would listen to me when I tell them that we need more forests than parking lots, McMansions, houses and yes Wal-Marts. See, if you build on every spare piece of land imaginable, and then abandon office buildings, etc…of course animals will begin eating out of your bird feeder. It is not the bear’s fault that you moved into his habitat and polluted it. This one is kind of a no-brainer.

If teens would listen to me they would understand a real hero is some one who saves a life, not who hit the home run. They would then be a lot less disappointed when their ‘hero’ gets banned from the sport because they cheated.

If people who are covered in tattoos would listen to me, they would realize that those cool tats are going to look really scary in the nursing home. So get one, maybe. But leave it at that. And think about what you are putting on your body. I mean really, you get a skull tattoo at 19 and then have to explain it to your 4 year old? Listen to me people!

If the World Leaders would listen to me they would understand if they were as polite as our children, learned to share, not break one another’s toys and for goodness sake just play well with others, we would have a lot less war, famine and poverty.

If the drug dealers/makers of the world would listen to me they would take their creative genius and instead of making Crack, Heroin, Ecstasy, etc…they would make Diet Coke less harmful and M&M’s less calories.

If I ran the US, stay at home moms would get a government salary. Not Welfare. But a stipend to allow her to raise her children the best way she knows how. As this works in other countries, I am pretty sure the US can manage it.

Speaking of Welfare, I know just how to reform the system. Stay with me here. Welfare is a good thing. But it is meant to help and support people as they get back on their feet. It is not supposed to take the place of employment. You are not supposed to be able to get your nails done, your hair done or drive a brand new car with the money taken from my wallet in the form of taxes. HOWEVER you are welcome to the money taken from my wallet in the form of taxes to help put food on the table, clothe yourself and your children and have a roof over your head. See the difference? So I would reform the welfare system back into WELL-FAIR. A program to help others and provide them security to care for their families.

If people would just listen to me there would be no discrimination. Back to the kids for a moment, we would look at the sandbox as our children do. That there are friends playing. Not that there is a white, black, purple or kid with a cane playing. Okay, Boo looks at the sandbox as water boarding. So we won’t look at the analogy from her point of view.

If the kids programming listened to me, they would not be dressing the girls as tramps. I am sorry, but I do not know one 12-year old who wears skirts that short or heels that high. Our children would start dressing as children. Fathers would stop saying, “Young lady you are not going out of the house looking like a tramp” and Mom’s would stop saying, “I swear that skirt looked like it covered her ass in the store”.

If the people who thought up the food pyramid added junk food onto it there wouldn’t be so many moms eating brownies in the closet.

If my husband would just admit I am always right BEFORE the argument he wouldn’t have to apologize as much.

And this is how I finished the sentence this Friday, I have a bad habit of…..Personally I cannot wait to read how Rich and Kristi answered this one.

What is your bad habit?

A while ago I asked a bunch of you the secrets of potty training. Allie was relatively easy. See she HAD to be trained by 2.9 otherwise she would not be able to go to preschool. I took 9 months to train her. Not the entire 9 months but I gave myself time and patience.

I personally think potty training is the hardest thing in the world to teach a child. I mean really how can you explain that your bladder is full, let alone that the sensation you currently feel running down your leg is pee?

It is trial and error. Allie was kind of easy. It took a bit, but she got it.

Boo scared the crap out of me. Okay, not literally. Well maybe.

Then she started showing interest in the potty. She is so petite the toilet wasn’t stabilizing enough for her. So I did something I swore I would NEVER do and went and got the dreaded….

Yup, I caved and got the potty chair. Now before you judge, I just never got it. To me having a portable toilet that the kid can move into the kitchen (ew), the living room or the bedroom (ewe) was more than I can handle.

Here is where Boo’s sense of order comes into play. She KNOWS that the potty remains in the bathroom. Thank the good Lord and all that is Holy.

I worked with her school, they have a training regimen they were willing to try. So last Monday Boo went to school in her big girl panties. Okay, she went to school in her diaper with big girl panties in her bag.

And she did it.

The first time they put her on the toilet she went. Then she went again and again.

It has been a little over a week and she hasn’t had an accident. Okay, she has had one accident. But I wasn’t home with her when it happened. I am not blaming the dad person who was home at the time…..I’m just saying that Boo continues to amaze me.

I am in awe.

This little girl who cannot tell me if she is hungry, tired or why she is hitting her head has enough understanding of her body to know that she has to go.

She goes on a schedule, but she also tells us to “ome ere” and will bring us into the bathroom. Okay, too much information.

But I am one proud mama.

While visiting family this weekend Allie had the unexpected surprise of adventure.  Believe it or not, this is in someone’s backyard. He should be featured on extreme tree houses.

Of course Dad had to take a ride

And Mom had to make sure it was safe

Allie now is trying to convince us that we should have one of these at our house. She invited our friend to come live with us and build her one.

 Boo hid in the garage and told us all to be CA-FUL. 

If I were to make a mix-tape for Tia, someone who deserves a tape for something they did, it would have to include:

Something by Cher because, well she rocks just like Tia does.

Wind beneath my wings by Bette Midler because I remember crying through that movie with her. Tia, not Bette

You’re my best friend by Queen just in case she forgot

Grade 9 by the Barenaked Ladies because well if we were making a mix tape it would have been when we were in grade 9

Don’t you forget about me by Simple Minds because every time I hear that song I think about her. And again, hey grade 9

Now admit it you thought it was a different kind of tape I was talking about, didn’t you?

Allie: Momma you are the best mom ever.
Me: Aw, thanks Allie
Allie: And I am not just saying that so you will let me stay up until 8:30.